Pediatricians Say Legalize Same-Sex Marriage

For the first time, the American Academy of Pediatrics said that it favors "civil marriage for same-gender couples - as well as full adoption and foster care rights for parents regardless of their sexual orientation..." The Academy also commented on it's opposition to the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA). 

The new policy statement estimates same-gender couples are raising about 115,000 children in nearly every county in every state across the country. The technical report accompanying the policy change reads, "Many studies have demonstrated that children's well-being is affected much more by their relationships with their parents, their parents' sense of competence and security, and the presence of social and economic support for the family than by the gender or sexual orientation of their parents."

The American Academy of Pediatrics policy statement can be accessed HERE.

Domestic Violence PSA

I came across this domestic violence PSA tonight. It is haunting. The video is titled, "One Photo a Day in the Worst Year of My Life." The sign at the end reads, "Help me, I don't know if I can wait for tomorrow."

 

50 Americas?

A recent CNN article takes aim at different state laws and regulations on marriage, specifically same-sex marriage. John D. Sutter (a human rights and social change columnist for CNN Opinion), highlights some of the complexities and complications that arise when couples move their marriage from one state to another.

His opinion piece calls the United States "fifty Americas" because the laws in each state can be so fundamentally split. He explains:

How does it make sense that a couple's love for each other would be recognized by one state and mocked in another? For lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people, the United States has turned into a complicated mess of 50 Americas -- most of which discriminate against them.

What are some of the differences between states you ask? Sutter provides the following as examples: 

• Some states protect LGBT tenants from being evicted because of their sexual orientation, while some states do not.
• Some states allow same-sex couples to adopt, and others outright ban it. 
• Some states let teachers talk about homosexuality in schools, while others (like Alabama) require teachers to mention "in a factual manner and from a public health perspective, that homosexuality is not a lifestyle acceptable tot eh general public and that homosexual conduct is a criminal offense under the laws of the state."
• Some states list sexual orientation as a protected class of persons in hate crime statutes, while others, like Oklahoma, do not (despite at the federal level, LGBT people are explicitly protected). 

Sutter closes his piece by stating, "Either we live in a nation that supports LGBT equality or we don't. But we can't have it 50 ways." His argument highlights a concern that differing state laws with respect to families (child custody, divorce, support, etc.) fracture and hurt Americans rather than help and protect. Should laws with respect to the family be at a national level? Why has society allowed so many differences to permeate state courts? Should the system change as the mobility of families have increased?

Read Sutter's opinion HERE.

Financial Cost of Divorce

Forbes just released an article identifying several ways that divorce takes money from your pocket book. Samantha Fraelich, a financial advisor with Bernard R. Wolfe & Associates, identifies five areas where divorce can cost you:

1. Legal Assistance

2. Childcare Expenditures

3. Uncle Sam

4. Future Planning

5. Insurance Needs

The article notes in part, "Divorce is one of the most stressful things an individual will go through, right up there with moving and death. The thing with divorce is that compared to death and the stress of relocating, divorce stays with yo in life. You take it with you when you move. You take it with you tip death. And it wears on the pocket book as much as it ways on the emotions."

Fraelich's argument begs the following question: Is the cost of divorce too high? Should divorce cost less? What are the policy considerations for the cost of divorce, and what can be done to reduce the cost of divorce?

Read the article HERE.

Baby Momma Drama- $10,000 Offered for Abortion

When Crystal Kelley signed up to be a surrogate, she knowingly agreed to carry a baby to term, give the baby to the parents who hired her, and cash the $22,000 check. She did not sign up to have an abortion. But in fact, that's what the parents who hired her demanded.

At five months pregnant, Kelley found out that the baby she was carrying had a cleft lip and palate, a cyst in her brain, and serious heart defects. The ultrasound technician couldn't find a stomach or a spleen. Doctors explained that while the baby would survive the pregnancy, there was only a 25% chance that the baby would have a normal life.

Dr. Elisa Gianferrari, a maternal fetal medicine specialist, and Leslie Ciarlglio, a genetic counselor, wrote the midwife saying, "Given the ultrasound findings, the parents feel the interventions required to manage the baby's medical problems are overwhelming for an infant, and that it is a more humane option to consider pregnancy termination." They wanted her to get an abortion. Kelly wanted no such thing. The contract Kelley signed stipulated that she would get an abortion in the case of a severe fetus abnormality - but the contract did not specify what constituted such an abnormality.

At that stage of pregnancy, the hospital noted two options for abortion: induce labor- the baby wouldn't survive, or "dilation and evacuation"- the baby is vacuumed out of the womb. The latter option was recommended as the less painful. When the mother attempted to schedule the abortion, the hospital told her that only Kelley could schedule that. The parents informed Kelley, through the surrogacy agency, that they wouldn't be the baby's legal parents, and that Kelley would be the only person who would be making decisions when the child was born.

As an incentive to get the abortion, the couple offered Kelley $10,000. In what Kelley calls a moment of weakness, she countered for $15,000. She regretted her counter almost immediately. The parents declined, and so did Kelley.

The parents hired an attorney who wrote Kelley saying, "You are obligated to terminate this pregnancy immediately."  Kelley received the letter on the day marking her 24th month of pregnancy, a milestone after which abortion is illegal.  The attorney informed Kelley that they would be suing for breach of contract for $8,000 - the amount of money they'd already paid - plus medical and legal fees.

Kelley got herself an attorney, Michael DePrimo, who informed her that no one could force her to have an abortion.  The parents' attorney contacted DePrimo informing him that they'd changed their minds. Instead of having an abortion, they wanted Kelley to deliver the child. They would then put the child into the hands of the state. DePrimo told Kelley her hands were effectively tied unless she went to a state with more favorable surrogacy laws. Kelley left Connecticut and traveled to Michigan, where state law would vest her with parental rights. She found another family to adopt the baby.

All seemed well until the initial parents filed in Connecticut's court to be the legal parents of the child. The filing included a shocking revelation: the mother wasn't the genetic mother- the couple had used an anonymous egg donor. While this case was pending, the baby was born. 

Weeks after the baby's birth, the two sides struck a deal. The father gave up paternal rights so long as his wife could keep in touch with the adoptive family. Kelley was able to give her baby to the newly found adoptive parents. While baby "S"still only has a 50% risk of surviving the surgeries she needs, the adoptive parents are hopeful and happy that she's theirs.

What do you think? Did Kelley make the right decision? What rights should surrogates have when they are hired to deliver a baby to another family? Will the parents win their suit for breach of contract?!

Read the complete article HERE.

Stolen Sperm = Child Support?

The break up between Toby Devall and Layne Hardin will have screenwriters and seedy novelists chomping at the bit. Imagine donating at a sperm bank, contracting with the sperm bank that only two people could ever access the sperm. Paying an annual fee to store the sperm. Then having an ex-girlfriend go into the sperm bank and get your sperm, no questions asked, and get pregnant with the stolen sperm. Now imagine being asked to pay child support. I imagine an E.L. adaptation will hit theaters next Spring. 

In 2002, Hardin and his then girlfriend Katherine LeBlanc decided to freeze Hardin's sperm after having their son who is now twelve. Subsequently, Hardin underwent a vasectomy. They signed a contract with the sperm bank giving future access to the sperm solely to LeBlanc if she decided to conceive another child.

Following his break up with LeBlanc, Hardin began dating Devall. Like most flash-in-the-pan relationships, the couple broke up two years ago. In what Hardin's attorney is calling a vindictive maneuver, Devall went to the sperm bank where Hardin's swimmers were stationed, and asked for, and received, two vials of sperm. She went next door and was successfully inseminated. 

Deval gave birth to a son who is now two. Hardin can now be asked to pay child support for this child he didn't know existed, nor ever anticipated! Hardin is sueing the fertility clinic and Devall. Hardin's attorney explains, "They [Hardin and the sperm bank] had a written contract that specified only two people that could access the sperm, yet the sperm bank let someone walk in off the street and take two vials of sperms in a paper lunch sack. They never checked. That's what's frightening."

Devall's attorney offered this in response, "This case involves the life of one innocent child. Soon, 12 men and women will see all of the evidence and make a decision based upon the true facts of the case. It is not fair to the family, nor the justice system to try this case in the media. The truth will come out at trial and will be reflected in the jury's verdict. We ask that you report the facts based on the evidence and allow our system to work as intended. 

The sperm bank had no comment. I wonder why...

Baby Found in Grocery Bag

This is unbelievably tragic. A baby is found by a woman who was out walking her dog just after 7:15PM. The baby was wrapped in a Walmart grocery bag. There are no leads as to who baby Chole's parents are, but for now she will spend time in the foster care system. What should the law do about problems like this? Should the mother and/or father face criminal charges? Should they get their baby back if they request her return? It's troubling to try to sort out. 

 

Read the article HERE.